A Direction?

Don has pretty much ruled out foster-to-adopt, which was where I was leaning.

And every time I go to an adoption site dedicated to adopting newborns, I feel guilty. I have had the priveledge of having four newborns of my own, and there are so many out there who cannot have even one. In my heart, I feel like I would be taking a baby away from someone.

That leaves adopting an older child domestically or international adoption.

Tonight we went to dinner at The Taste of Texas with Don's business group. It is one our favorite restaurants and happens to be the place where we had dinner the night before I started treatment for my cancer.

It seemed a fitting bookend to "the other side" of cancer.

While we were there, I met one of Don's colleagues, J.P., who happened to be from Guatemala. We talked about many things with several other colleagues. And as it turned out, he ended up sitting at our end of the table of over 20 people.

As I was sitting there, conversing with all the people around me the thought occured to me: "What if J.P. was put here to direct me to the idea of adopting specifically from Guatemala?"

A short time later, the restaurant was clearing out, and it was getting quiet. I could hear music playing over the intercom system. The song playing was "Our Hope Endures" by Natalie Grant. It is a song that God had given me (through a friend) last month and I had been listening to it daily.

I felt like that was a sign that yes, I was going in the right direction.

Valentine's Day

Radiation is complete.

I am ready to start looking to the future.

Adoption in general is just plain overwhelming. There is domestic, international (and if so, which country), foster-to-adopt? Boy or Girl? How do we pay for it?

I pray constantly that God will guide me in the direction He would have us go.

I have been researching adoption options, talking with others who have been there, gathering information, etc.

When Don and I went to lunch today, I asked him about how he was feeling about adoption, explained to him the different things I was considering, and asked what he thought about it all.

He is very preoccupied with our church building project. The building won't be started until the fall. And there are a lot of things that must happen before the foundation can be laid.

It is heavy on his mind and he really feels he cannot consider adoption until the building is started.

He is doing what God has called him to do. I am setting about doing what God has called me to do. And I pray that, over time, God will steer his heart towards adoption as well.