Wednesday, July 29, 2009

Hope Deferred

Hope deferred makes the heart sick, but a dream fulfilled is a tree of life. Proverbs 13:12


I am trying to be patient. But my heart is sick. I feel a huge burden of the weight of other people's problems. I am truly, earnestly praying for them. God can take the burden and bear it much better than I can.


Yet somehow, my heart is still sick. I am not sure what it is. Hormones. Chemo. Turning 40.


It has been a long time since my heart hurt this bad. I cried today over Michael. I cried because it seems Hope may never come.


I contemplated taking down the tree. Giving away all my little clothes I have in storage. I feel like I'm losing my mind.


It hasn't been a good day. I pray tomorrow is better.