Sunday, July 1, 2007

The beginning

Michael was gone. We said goodbye months ago. And although the grief was still new and the pain piercing at times, thoughts of him did not consume me every minute of every day anymore.

We took our usual summer vacation. Once again, visiting Colorado and the YMCA of the Rockies.

God was gracious and we were able to book a cabin at the last minute for the days we wanted.

A cabin on the YMCA grounds offers many benefits: privacy, a full kitchen, plenty of space inside and out, a spacious balcony with sweeping views of the Rocky Mountains in the not-too-far distance. Hands down, the children's favorite part of having a cabin is exploring and excavating just down the steps from our lodging. The only negative to this pasttime is the small risk of mountain lions in the area.

For that reason, on this day, I was watching their adventures from above on the balcony when God spoke to me. I know it was God and not my own human desires, because I was completely focused on my living, breathing children at that moment.

He said, "the next time you are here, you will have another child."

As I have learned to do with things God chooses to reveal to me, I treasured it in my heart. Just as Mary did after the birth of Jesus. People were coming and worshipping her son. While she knew he was the son of God, she was still human and could not fully understand what it all meant until much later. Only when God chose to reveal more to her, could she truly appreciate what was being said and done in those days of shepherds and wise men.

I could not possibly grasp what God intended for me to know fully in that moment. So I chose not to analyze what God had spoken to me any further than to consider how it would be a long time before we come back here. And anything can happen in a long time.

No comments:

Post a Comment